Domestic Violence Survivors

This is a continuation post about Domestic Violence topic. If you haven’t read my previous post about Signs Of Domestic Violence and Make An Escaping Plan, you can read it here and here.
After manage to escape, what are you going to do next? Some choose to just run away as far as possible such as move into a different town or country. Well, that is an option too. In this case, you don’t want any more problems and meet your abuser face to face. That’s okay but it won’t solve your problem. There’s still a possibility that he will hunt you and find you back, right?
Another option is you can sue him for what he did and put him into jail for a looong time. In order to do this, you need to provide all evidences you have about the abuses. In Oprah Winfrey show, I find out that you also need to record each date and day of the beatings by making a kind of notes or journal where you can describe the abuse in details. You also need to have pictures of any injuries or bruises you got after got beaten. The point is you must complete any evidence you have with accurate time and date. So you will be able to explain the abuse you got in the court with confidence. In this way, your abuser’s lawyer won’t find a gap to kick you back and accusing you for making all things up. This is also a right option for you if you want to win custody of your kids. If you successfully proved your abuser guilty in the court then you will win the custody.

Anyway, I collected information to make this triple articles based on various sources including magazines, books, TV show or website and this is a general information. This is not an expert opinion since obviously I’m not a Domestic Violence expert myself. But I think, as a woman, I will fully support action to spread the awareness of these domestic abusive behaviors by sharing the signs of domestic abuse itself and tell you that you are not alone there. You can always find some help you if you open yourself and seek for it and speak up instead of being silent. For further information, you still need to discuss with marriage consultants/experts for more helps...

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Make A Plan To Escape

This is a continuation post about Domestic Violence topic and if you need to read my previous post about Signs of Domestic Violence here. After knowing that you might be one of thousand females who got abused by their own husbands, dads or even their own kids, what will you do? One thing for sure, you must get out of this situation and find another place to protect yourself. For this, you must make plans about it first.
First, plan to escape.
Since your abuser usually makes a tight daily schedule for you, it’s not easy to go to different places to ask for help without being noticed by him. But you can’t do this escape by yourself; you are going to need help either from your friend or any other people you trust. It’s better for you to not involving too many people in this plan to keep it secret. At least you must have someone who can provide you place to hide temporarily so that your abuser won’t find you and forced you to go back home immediately. You need to hide for few moments. Find one person and tell him/her about your condition and you need help. They can also help you to make a right plan about determining the right time to escape.
Second, the budget plan.
Leaving the house means you need more money to survive. You can’t rely on your ally for this since they also have their own budget plan. So, you must start keeping your own money long before determining the escaping day. It’s not easy for you since he must have controlled every penny you have. So you must act wisely to find the best way to steal a little amount of money every time, for yourself, before giving the rest of it to him. Hide your money in places that you absolutely think he wouldn’t ever find out. Be patient on this to avoid any kind of suspicion.
Third, what will you do after managed to escape.
You can not just run away and do nothing. You need to know what you are going to do next. Are you planning to just run away as far as you can; including moving to different town or country? Or are you planning to sue him for what he’s done to you? Do you have kids with him that you need to strive for?
Let’s find out about those options in the next posts.

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Are You Being Domestically Abused?

Has he ever hit you before? I mean your husband or boyfriend? Domestic violence is increasing in significant numbers this year. Female who got hit or killed by her spouse, dad, or even her own kid has become popular news nowadays. You need to look around your self and your neighborhood to find out. Because according to some experts, the victims of domestic violence usually unaware of the fact they’re actually victims. Some of them have been experiencing the beatings and abuses for too many years and finally get used to it. They consider all the beatings, violence and humiliation they got as something that they deserved to have each day. Meanwhile, some other may already know that they’re victims of domestic violence but decide to stay silent and hope everything will be better after sometimes while actually thing isn’t going to be any better. But first, how to identify the situation before determining yourself as victim of domestic violence?
Below are some of the signs that you can observe on your own.
* You’ve been regularly hit for no reason; you got bruises and lots of injuries all over your body.
* He isolates you from your parents, family and friends. You can only rely on him.
* He makes daily time schedule for you everyday, so he will know exactly what kind of activities you have and where.
* He beats you if you fail to follow the time table he gave.
* He humiliates you every time he saw you and makes you sad and embarrassed.
* You can’t use a phone without him around to watch you, he controls whatever you said.
* You feel bad about yourself and have low self esteem issue.
* You aren’t allowed to keep your own money. He makes all decision about money himself, even if you are the breadwinner and he stays at home sleeping.
Actually there are so many other signs about domestic violence but if you having most of the signs above, and then there is a huge possibility that you are trapped in this domestic violence right now. Next, we will talk about what you are going to do in order to escape from this situation.

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